- Daisey Miller posted a tweet about her mornings enjoying coffee with her husband in her garden.
- The tweet quickly went viral as many called out her perceived privilege.
- Miller told Insider that the response “shocked” her and that people had “blown it out of proportion.”
On October 21, 24-year-old Daisey Miller posted a tweet about her husband that she said was “totally off-hand.” Miller, who previously had around 12,000 followers, was used to posting what she told Insider were “random things” about her day-to-day life.
She said, “I had just finished having coffee and a sweet conversation with my husband, so I thought I would tweet about it. I didn’t really think anything of it.”
The tweet read, “my husband and i wake up every morning and bring our coffee out to our garden and sit and talk for hours. every morning. it never gets old & we never run out of things to talk to. love him so much.”
Miller, who lives in Sacramento, California, said the tweet began to gain traction around 10 hours after she posted it, and she was extremely “confused” by the reaction — while there were positive comments, many responses were scathing, calling Miller out for being “privileged” and assuming that she and her husband, who have been married for four months, were likely wealthy.
The tweet quickly spread and has since received over 14,000 quote tweets.
Miller told Insider, “I just tweeted it because I felt happy and grateful. I was a little shocked that it was blowing up, and at first, there was so much negativity.”
—daisey🌼🌱 garden coffee lady (@lilplantmami) October 21, 2022
The tweet led to a furious debate about class and privilege, as people felt that her routine betrayed a lifestyle that should not be taken for granted.
Miller told Insider that while she understands some of the criticism, she thinks people could be kinder when responding to others online.
Miller acknowledges she is able to live a life that’s unattainable to many
The majority of the backlash stemmed from the assumption that Miller had minimal other responsibilities, such as work or childcare, if she was able to spend so much time in her garden with her husband. Many comments also questioned whether she had a job at all.
In a follow-up tweet, Miller said she and her husband “are not rich by any means,” adding, “We’ve worked extremely hard to get to where we’re at. We live very minimally and consciously and work jobs that match our lifestyle and allow us to live the life that we do.”
Miller told Insider she owns her own business providing skincare treatments and her husband is a yoga teacher and professional skateboarder. They both work flexible hours.
—daisey🌼🌱 garden coffee lady (@lilplantmami) October 23, 2022
Miller acknowledges that her flexible schedule means she is “privileged in a way.”
“I think a lot of people did have a point about privilege because many aren’t able to spend quality time with their partners. I was able to recognize that and see where they were coming from,” she told Insider. Still, she said her lifestyle “didn’t make me feel bad or embarrassed, it’s just something I’ve worked to achieve.”
According to research by Statista, the average amount of time people in the United States spent working in September 2022 was 34.5 hours, while a study published by the CDC in 2019 revealed that Americans averaged over five hours of free time per day.
After the dramatic response to her tweet, Miller hopes to focus on the positives
Miller told Insider she thinks many people had been “blowing it out of proportion” and said that the assumptions people had of her, such as that she is “rich and jobless,” weren’t true at all.
She said, “I think there’s a lot of sad people that are hurting and just need a little bit of kindness and love and time to focus on that in their own lives. I think their negativity was maybe a reflection of that hurt.”
But the conversation around Miller’s tweet didn’t stay focused on her for long. It pivoted to people mocking those that had previously been calling her out, as well as memes about how an innocent tweet can garner backlash.
Some also pointed out that the idea that working-class people don’t have time to have coffee in the morning is a misconception.
—krista (@kayellx_) October 23, 2022
Miller told Insider she “wasn’t affected” by the response, saying, “I take what people say online with a grain of salt, it doesn’t affect my life in the real world or the enjoyment I get from having coffee with my husband.”
Miller said she is extremely grateful for the kindness she’s seen both in the response to the criticism and the messages she’s had from people on Twitter. “I’ve gotten really kind DMs from people telling me to keep staying positive and to keep posting about my relationship because it’s inspiring to them, which is really nice,” she said.
Miller said she would continue to post about her husband and her garden, regardless of what people think, because she enjoys sharing “those important and cherished things” about her life.
For more stories like this, check out coverage from Insider’s Digital Culture team here.